Robbie Williams thanked a sold-out crowd of Kiwi fans for “saving his life" during his Mission Estate Winery show in Hawkes Bay on the weekend.
The ‘Angels’ singer paused mid-concert for a raw and honest chat about sobriety and dealing with the lows of fame.
“I wanted you to like me, and if I thought that you didn’t then it would hurt me tremendously, and I’m still that way,” Robbie began.
He then described how the negative voices inside his head began to take over during the early stages of his career.
“THEY WOULD TELL ME THAT I WAS USELESS, AND THEY WOULD TELL ME THAT I WAS STUPID, THAT I COULDN’T SING, I WAS GOOD FOR NOTHING.”
Going right back to the days of auditioning for the extremely successful pop group Take That, Robbie talks about how despite the rise to fame the voices never quietened.
In fact, “They got louder”.
“I tried to drown out the voices by turning to alcohol and drugs,” the singer revealed.
“IT WAS LIKE A HIGHWAY TO HELL AND I EXPERIENCED HELL. I HAD TO STOP TO SAVE MY LIFE.”
Robbie then explained it wasn’t a choice purely out of “wanting to”, but because of facing “near death”.
Sharing his journey of sobriety Robbie proudly shared that it’s been 24 years since his last drink, a major achievement to celebrate from his last show in New Zealand where he shared that he was 18 years sober.
The sold-out crowd of close to 25,000 Kiwis erupted in a cheer, applauding the ‘Feel’ singer on his milestone.
While the singer has accomplished a long stint of sobriety, he admits it came with facing some “demons” in the form of depression and anxiety.
But what got him through his darkest days was two things. Meeting his wife Ayda Field and his fans.
“I GENUINELY WANT TO THANK YOU ON BEHALF OF ME AND MY FAMILY. YOU’RE A BIG PART OF THE REASON WHY I’M STILL ALIVE TODAY.”
This isn’t the only moment of raw emotion Robbie displayed while here in NZ.
The singer took to Instagram to share he’s allowed himself to have a “big blub” following the release of his Netflix documentary.
“So I woke up here In New Zealand yesterday to 25 texts, a similar amount in WhatsApp and a long list of emails. Some from people I haven’t spoken to for many many years. All reaching out to congratulate me on the documentary,” he wrote alongside his post.
Robbie continued: “After replying to many of them I just burst out crying. A good cry. As with tears, my first response was to stop them. And then I told myself ‘Nah, fuck it. Go on, have a big blub’ So I did. I blubbed.”
The singer revealed for the first time in a long time he felt relief and had learned to love himself.
Robbie’s documentary 'Raw. Honest. Real' is out now on Netflix.