Making friends can be incredibly daunting, but it seems the older we get, the more difficult it becomes. Jay-Jay Feeney has had her own experience in making friends as an adult and is sharing her tips on how you can get yourself out there and make some mates.
In her ‘Judge Jay-Jay’ column for Woman’s Day, a woman named Maria wrote in asking for help on how to make friends in a new city.
“I was recently transferred for my work, moving from Hamilton to Tauranga. I am single and my family lives in Wellington, so it wasn't a problem for me to move, but I'm struggling to find friends here,” Maria wrote.
“It's embarrassing to admit because I'm not entirely shy – I just don't know how to meet people!”
Jay-Jay, having been in the same situation, was able to offer some sound advice.
“A new city and no friends – it's terrifying! I have been there. I moved to Christchurch for my first year at More FM and although everyone was friendly, I found it quite cliquey and hard to penetrate the groups of friends already established. But I did in the end,” Jay-Jay began.
She continued: “I was proactive, joined in with their activities and invited them to do things. It was easier for me because I started with work colleagues. Since you don't have that advantage, I have some other ideas for you.
My boss Amy moved to New Zealand from Perth recently and she has made so many friends.
She started by using the Friend Finder app and actually met a few women on there with common interests. They went on coffee dates and to restaurants etc. She also joined a few groups on Facebook for cycling, knitting and couch surfing!
She has been on bike rides with people, went to a knitting club and meets people from out of town who stay on her sofa for the night. All different people with different backgrounds and life stories. She is having a blast! I'm so impressed by her.”
Jay-Jay added: “So in a case like this, you have to put yourself out there. Join a group with common interests and make the effort to meet people. You won't click with all of them, but you may just find your next best friend.”
If you want to hear more from Jay-Jay or have a sticky situation of your own, Woman's Day NZ is running a ‘Judge Jay-Jay’ column where she is more than happy to help you through your biggest concerns.